Evil Clown Preparedness

We all know it's only a matter of time before our towns are overrun by armies of evil clowns. Here at Gator Guns we're dedicated to offering our clients a full array of equipment to fight them off when that day comes. Don't be caught off guard-- prepare yourself now. No single weapon will fit every situation, so to ensure your safety, we recommend at the very least:

• A pistol in a suitable caliber for clown takedown. We've seen clowns laugh off a 9mm bullet with no problem, so consider larger calibers.
• A 12-guage shotgun. Not as maneuverable in cramped spaces, but when you need the firepower it'll come in handy.
• A semi-automatic rifle in at least .308 caliber. Nothing says "I hate clowns" like a Bushmaster.
• A machete, because it looks cool.

One important tip: When shooting at a clown, it's especially important to aim for center mass. Don't waste ammunition going for headshots, as their wigs and hats and such. When a clown is threatening to consume your eternal soul, seconds count!